Most people remember their first day that they are wearing skinny jeans as one of the most memorable days of their lives. This is for men and women. For the first time, they will be grabbing onto a tight pair and make them hug their body from down under. It's supposed to be a good feeling right.
That wasn't the case for me.
One night, I was hanging out with a friend at a night club. Let's call him Harry. Harry decided to put me to the challenge. He wanted me to wear a pair of skinny jeans that he owns and walk around it for the rest of the night. He wanted me to not look like my casual self anymore. I will admit that I tend to look conservative every now and then, but I am not like that all the times. Sometimes the rock star side of me does come out, especially at karaoke clubs. But at the end of the day, I am not a crazy party animal who likes to go out and look freaky every single night.
We arrived down the street and he gave me the clothes. I got back home and I was already scared. Those skinny jeans were tight beyond belief. I had moments when I was getting ready to just give up on the challenge. However, I am a person that doesn't turn down promises. When I make a promise to a friend, I keep it to the very end. So I held my head up and walked out of that house with the clothes on.
The second I hit the nightclub I felt like I was surrounded by provocative paparazzis. People saw that I was "excited". I was excited due to the fact that the heat inside of me was building up walking so long. Then as the heat builded up the testosterone got higher on the inside. But that didn't mean a thing for everyone around th nightclub. All they saw was someone getting all erected and they wanted a piece of it. I tried walking away slowly. Suddenly, everyone started grabbing my front door and back door. It was like a secret drunk sex party was going on. Everyone was totally intoxicated. I was the only sober person in the building.
I couldn't even dance without having everyone staring at me. It was like someone secretly put male enhancement pills in the Sprite I was drinking. Thirty minutes after leaving, I just knew it was time to go. I couldn't take it anymore.
Harry requested that I should stay a little longer. I turned around, pointed the middle finger and I said "Kiss my ass."