Tuesday, March 29, 2016

The Seagulls Were Eyeballing My Gyro

There truly is a reason why most people don't eat on the piers alone anymore.

For the first time in my life, I ordered a lamb gyro from one of those stands outside near campus. There is a five dollar student special. I can get a gyro and a free soda. Feeling spontaneous that day, I decided to have a lamb gyro, which was something I never ate before.

I took a bite out of that gyro and felt in absolute heaven. The lamb was cooked right and the tzatziki sauce gave it a lovable flavor that you couldn't help but to keeping bites of it. Feeling like I was in humble heaven, I decided to go sit down by the pier and enjoy much lunch.

Sadly, it didn't go as planned.

Fifteen minutes after sitting down alone, I was accompanied by a seagull who landed on the rail after flying in a circle for quite a while. He stared at me and my gyro like a cartoon character for a considerable amount of time. I knew what he wanted and I wasn't giving it to him. I continued taking bites out of my gyro, trying to ignore him. The plan didn't go well for another seagull landed beside it. Two later became four.

By the fourth seagull, I was already wrapping up my gyro, and power walking away from them before the fifth one was even halfway close to landing on the rail.

I was afraid that in any minute, a team of seagulls would fly down, and reenact that scene from the movie Finding Nemo with the seagulls on the rocks. You could imagine how crazy life would've gotten on that dock if it happened.

Thursday, March 24, 2016

"Game of Thrones" Fandom Popped Up In The Subway

A day doesn't go buy when I don't hear a single person bragging about something that happened in the Game of Thrones franchise. Whether it's the A Song of Fire & Ice book series or the TV show itself, someone around the world is mentioning this show at least twice, maybe a hundred times a day. What's more funny is that no matter where you are, the fans of the franchise are hiding amongst us. You never know when they will pop out until one person pulls out one of the novels from the series.

I would count T-shirts, but I don't think the average person would yank a person's Game of Thrones t-shirt, bragging about how much they love the shirt. My point is you never know where the fans are. I had that moment last night on the subway.

I was riding uptown to get home from a busy day of class and work. I just finished a gig with the Time Out New York team, handing out free copies of the Wednesday issue, which is something we do every Wednesday. While I was too busy reading the new issue and excited to get the official guide of the 2016 Tribeca Film Festival, this seemingly 20-something woman sat down two seats away from me.

There was this guy sitting between us in the three seat section of the New York City subway. He was skinny enough for me to see that the woman was carrying a book. I'm a nosy reader. Whether I'm reading a book of my own or not, I still look towards my side to see which book is the other person is reading. So I looked over, I saw that she was reading A Feast for Crows, the second book in the series.

I gave a smirk, for I was amused that I discovered another Game of Thrones, but I wasn't as vocal as the next person that occupied that middle seat. When the man sitting between us, got up and left the train, a random female that was sitting across from run, ran to our side, and took that seat.

They were discussing all these theories by Tyrion, Nickolai, Emilia, Sophie, Aidan, to name a few. They even predicted what the next book will be about, and whether George R.R. Martin will write prequels to the book. And if that was the case, HBO should turn the prequels into a TV show, which will possibly end up receiving more ratings than the actual show.

I looked around the subway. There were at least eight to ten people looking straight towards them. They were so into the conversation that it dawned to me that they were fans of the show too. I was waiting for the moment when one of them just jump out of their seats, stand on top of them, and give their commentary about the show. They didn't and the ladies kept talking.

This was a conversation that lasted at least twenty minutes or more. I say more because by the time I got off my train, they were still talking. I felt a little bad I couldn't chime in the conversation. I'm currently reading the first book and I never watched the TV show. I'm the type of person where I want to read the books before I watch their media adaptations.

I made that mistake bouncing back and forth in my childhood where I would read a Harry Potter book, and then I watch the film adaptation of the next book because I wanted to keep up.

The Game of Thrones fandom is truly everywhere, and you never know where they're going to pop up.

Friday, March 18, 2016

Stop Bringing Up Your Boyfriends! I Just Want To Talk!

I just love it when gay men do this. They believe that just because you're starting a conversation for the first time with a new person, they assume that they are flirting with you. Here you are, the casual single person who is all about meeting new people at casual events, and just want to make them comfortable. It's understandable that meeting new people can be nerve wrecking, but it doesn't have to be if a not so bad looking stranger wants to talk to you. But just because you believe the person is casually talking, you have to bring up the fact that you have a boyfriend.

There is no problem bringing up that you have a problem, but based on the way gay men are relentlessly mentioning it to every stranger they stumble upon, it's becoming ridiculous.

For single people, there are times and places where we are not looking for a lover. It's not a day to day job to find the man of your dreams. There are days when we just want to meet someone and have a casual conversation. After all, it's weird being in a room full of people you don't know. We're just easing out the nervousness by actually talking to someone.

We want to know how you are. What you're doing hanging out at this spot? What kind of martini are you drinking? What are you things you do or into, casually speaking?

Some of us are not looking for lovers. We just want to talk.

Sadly, we have to deal with the instant conversation ender. You meet someone at places like a nightclub or restaurant. You're casually talking to them, just trying to make them comfortable, and not make them seem nervous because you're a new person to them, and they don't know what to say. Instantly, they bring up a story about their partner. Either, they're waiting for their boyfriend to come to the spot, or they're mentioning a previous conversation he and his boyfriend had the other day.

The instant killer in wanting you to walk away from this person. Obviously, they thought you were trying to get hitched or something with them, and they felt the need to shut it down instantly before you kept talking. I personally never understand that as a current single man. It takes time for me to want to be interested in someone. I just like having casual conversations with people. So I find it weird when people mention their partners like that.

So out of rebellion, I'll say this to the casual person. Please stop mentioning your boyfriends. I'm not proposing to you. I just want to talk about football or martinis.

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Do New Yorkers Truly Mean It When They Say "I'm Sorry?"

Coming from the eyes of someone who wasn't born and raised, I can't help but to think in some occasions, New York City is the most common place for people to not mean their apology, or actually mean it. After all, when you step on someone's foot on the train because you are trying to get in, you better apologize or else you're going to get yelled at. New York City's attitude is off the charts. They will blow up in your face or say something smart without giving a damn.

Being a Southern man, we respond to that attitude differently, but that's another blog story.

I'm just saying that there are cases when someone from up here and apologizes to me, and I can read through their face that they didn't mean anything. One time on campus, I was sitting at a table in the cafeteria studying for an upcoming test. My textbooks occupied half the table, which I was more than willing to move if someone wanted to sit there. That wasn't the case in this moment.

Instead, a couple power walked to my table, kicked two tables near me that collided with my body, and sat down together. Their bodies hit the desk so hard, three of my papers fell. When the girl said she was sorry she did it with a large smirk. I instantly knew she didn't mean it. She wanted to grab those seats and knock the papers down. As long as her and her boyfriend got to sit down, she didn't give a damn if she was violating space or knocking something over.

Another time, the family that lives above my apartment knocked on my door to see if they looked out my window. Two days prior, their daughter dropped their keys out their window, and they assumed it fell onto my balcony. I tried explaining to the mother that her daughter and I checked that balcony from both ends. I walked out the window and walked the balcony myself to look for it.

She insisted on coming in and see for herself to change the locks. For me, I was uncomfortable because I had a guest over, and we just finished having "alone time." I didn't want just anyone coming in. I'm very uncomfortable having a random stranger just come in and come out.

But instead, I let her in. The whole time she's saying "I'm sorry" for pushing me to let her in. And she kept saying it on her way out the door. In the midst of all this, I couldn't help but to read the way she was saying it. I instantly knew that she didn't mean her apologies. She truly wanted to come in and see for herself, and she didn't care if I was uncomfortable or not.

These are just one of the many examples I can use as to how I see how New Yorkers truly don't mean it when they say "I'm sorry." I'm surprised no one has created a magazine column dedicated to this.

Either way, I can't help but wonder about this when it comes to New Yorkers? Do they truly mean it when they say "I'm sorry?"

Thursday, March 10, 2016

The Largest Slice For The Skinny Guy

It's very interesting how people treat you when they serve, especially when they see how small you look. It reminds me of my family. I come from a Southern family in New Orleans, Louisiana. If any of my family members thought someone was too skinny, they would force feed you until it looks like there are meat on your bones.

"Just because you don't go to the gym doesn't mean you should look like one," my uncle once said.

I have no choice, but to embrace my slim built body. On my father's side, there is this family gene that the men are always skinny. From my uncle to grandfather, cousins, all of us men are naturally skinny. The only exception is my father because he lays concrete. If he wasn't doing that, I'm sure he would be skinny just like us.

The other day, I was visiting my favorite $1 pizza place Two Bros. I accidentally skipped breakfast again and I was really starving. I stood in line, which was gone in a few seconds. I asked for a slice and the female that served me pulled a removed a slice from the pie that was fresh out of the oven. It was a small piece, but it was a stable size for me. I would've eaten it and still got full. The female employee thought differently.

Before I could grab the plastic plate, she pulled it back and took a look at my bed from head to toe. She had to tip toe over the counter to see my body. She immediately put the slice back with the pie, cut off the biggest slice, and handed it to me. I was instantly shocked because I didn't know she was going to do something like that.

I was about to open my mouth, but I couldn't once she said "You need more meat on your bones."

I took the slice and walked away without asking questions. I know what she meant and accepted the slice she gave me. I laughed on my way to work, for it continues to be funny when stuff like this happens to my a slim built man.

Thursday, March 3, 2016

When My Body Cleanse Responded To Junk Food

Everyone cheats on their cleanse and I had to cheat in the most dramatic way.

During the end January this year, I decided to take go through a detox and a cleanse. Due to the holidays, I found myself eating junk food and drinking nothing but gin & tonics. I was in a good creative space and I couldn't help but to get going. That's the one thing about being an artist. You sacrifice something in order to let the creativity flow.

In my case, it was my food intake.

I went through he cleanse for three weeks straight and it was quite the process. I drank nothing but cucumber lemon water along with bottled coconut water. I ate lots of fruit and vegetables. I bought meat from the healthiest side of New York City. Matter of fact, every meal I had was balanced. There was no junk food in my system for weeks.

That all changed one evening.

I was meeting with my colleagues in Tribeca to discuss this play we were writing for my college's theater program. I slept most of the morning and afternoon. By the time evening came, I was very hungry. I left my apartment without grabbing a snack and took the train downtown. There was no time to waste. I had to make it to the meeting on time.

I made the decision to cheat on my cleanse by getting a $1 pizza from Two Bros on West 4th St. When it comes to $1 pizzas in the Big Apple, I always count on Two Bros to give me a large slice. And they did. I arrived there and they gave me the largest slice on the rack.

The minute I ate that slice my body wanted to kill me. My body didn't have junk food in it's body for quite a while. So it was in a state of shock when that slice of cheese pizza entered my system. It began to churn like a wheel. It was screaming like a little girl, metaphorically speaking. I found myself in the middle of the village grabbing my stomach like I was about to throw up or have a meltdown.

A woman walked over to me asking me if I was alright, for I grabbed onto a light pole and was staring down at the concrete. I explained to her that I was cleansing and I just had a slice of pizza. She instantly understood what I meant.

"Just walk it out," she said. "I'm a detox girl myself. Believe me, I know what you're going through. Just walk it out."

You can always count on a health nut to be somewhere in the city. So that's what I did. I walked it out while drinking coconut water in between. My body cleanses sure has interesting ways in responding to unhealthy things.