Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Do New Yorkers Truly Mean It When They Say "I'm Sorry?"

Coming from the eyes of someone who wasn't born and raised, I can't help but to think in some occasions, New York City is the most common place for people to not mean their apology, or actually mean it. After all, when you step on someone's foot on the train because you are trying to get in, you better apologize or else you're going to get yelled at. New York City's attitude is off the charts. They will blow up in your face or say something smart without giving a damn.

Being a Southern man, we respond to that attitude differently, but that's another blog story.

I'm just saying that there are cases when someone from up here and apologizes to me, and I can read through their face that they didn't mean anything. One time on campus, I was sitting at a table in the cafeteria studying for an upcoming test. My textbooks occupied half the table, which I was more than willing to move if someone wanted to sit there. That wasn't the case in this moment.

Instead, a couple power walked to my table, kicked two tables near me that collided with my body, and sat down together. Their bodies hit the desk so hard, three of my papers fell. When the girl said she was sorry she did it with a large smirk. I instantly knew she didn't mean it. She wanted to grab those seats and knock the papers down. As long as her and her boyfriend got to sit down, she didn't give a damn if she was violating space or knocking something over.

Another time, the family that lives above my apartment knocked on my door to see if they looked out my window. Two days prior, their daughter dropped their keys out their window, and they assumed it fell onto my balcony. I tried explaining to the mother that her daughter and I checked that balcony from both ends. I walked out the window and walked the balcony myself to look for it.

She insisted on coming in and see for herself to change the locks. For me, I was uncomfortable because I had a guest over, and we just finished having "alone time." I didn't want just anyone coming in. I'm very uncomfortable having a random stranger just come in and come out.

But instead, I let her in. The whole time she's saying "I'm sorry" for pushing me to let her in. And she kept saying it on her way out the door. In the midst of all this, I couldn't help but to read the way she was saying it. I instantly knew that she didn't mean her apologies. She truly wanted to come in and see for herself, and she didn't care if I was uncomfortable or not.

These are just one of the many examples I can use as to how I see how New Yorkers truly don't mean it when they say "I'm sorry." I'm surprised no one has created a magazine column dedicated to this.

Either way, I can't help but wonder about this when it comes to New Yorkers? Do they truly mean it when they say "I'm sorry?"

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